Counting to potatoe in Japanese

It was hot today. Like, really hot. My mom said that it was recommended to stay as much as possible in the shadows and to avoid doing strenuous activities. It was that hot. Didn't stop me from waltzing to the Albert Heijn, our local supermarket, and a post office, though. I desperately needed a pen. I ran out of proper writing materials some days ago and I wanted a notebook for my Japanese studies, so I decided to take a look at this shop that sells office supplies.

First of all, they are really expensive. I wanted to go to a store called the Action, which is like heaven for cheapskates like me, but it's really far away and my steel stag is dead. The back tire is flat with a hole in it with a radius of one centimeter. At least it died quickly without any suffering. Within 10 seconds the tire was completely flat. This happened months ago and I've been to lazy to get it fixed. But to get back on track, the Action was too far away so I decided to take a look in this office supply store. 

After scouting for a good 20 minutes I decided on a simple flat soft cheap soft cover notebook with blocks instead of lines. It helps to keep the characters organized. One character per box. It's a bit tricky to stuff really complex Kanji in one box, but so far so good. I filled a few pages already with information, like the Hiragana chart, Katakana chart, and some Kanji on numerals and how to count. I also bought a black ball pen, which I love. It was 40 cents, I don't know if that is really cheap, but it was cheap enough for me. Desperate times require desperate measures.

I had a breakfast of milk and cookies. After I bought my stuff at the office supply store - I should really take a better look at the name of the store next time - I doubled back and bought milk, chocolate chip cookies and hot pockets from the Albert Heijn. Currently the hot pockets are still laying in the drawer, untouched. I think. The cookies are nearly all gone, only a few survivors are left. That's what happens if I tell my sister that there are milk and cookies. 

My mom got me Fanta and donuts, which I accepted gratefully. I was eating donuts while watching Lost Girl when my mom barged in. She wanted to loan 615 euro's from me to pay for a vacation. It was a bit awkward because my fingers were all sticky from the chocolate donut I was eating and I couldn't touch anything really. This greatly complicated the notion of picking one's laptop up and to pause the video. Me and my first world problems.

So I went downstairs with my mom and we did the transaction. Then I went back to watching Lost Girl. That season finale was tense. I might have cried out during a few particular moments. Later my mom said that she canceled the trip because while it was a vacation, you had to figure out a way to get there yourself. There was no plane included. That's quite inconvenient. She called the enterprise to cancel the vacation, and if all goes well my money should be back tomorrow. I'm probably going to forget to check my bank account tomorrow.

I forgot to wash my work cloths, so now they are still stinky and slightly covered in brushed of flower. Maybe I'm too aggressive with filling the flower shelves, the stuff always goes everywhere, particularly on me. I'll have to spray it with an excessive amount of deodorant to elude my fellow co-workers tomorrow. My 3/4th eaten cake is still laying on my bureau next to the old shoe boxes. I still have two donuts left. I'm going to leave them for tomorrow. Also, I can - in theory -  count to 99 in Japanese now. Go me.
 

Late Night Screenplaying

My sister has been accepted at the Bonifatius College, which my mom so lovely yelled way to early in the morning at around 11. She was calling my name from down the stairs, and first I thought that something was wrong, like a fire. Not such a pleasant way to start the day.

I got dressed, deciding that I was going to work on my Japanese. When I was working on memorizing some more  Hiragana characters my mom got home. Together we took care of some financial business that has everything to do with me turning eighteen in 13 days. We also ordered the school books for next year. Next year  I won't have to borrow the art history book of my teacher anymore.  My mom did most of the stuff, though. The only real thing I did was posting a letter for school.

It was an other hot day today. When I went outside to post that letter I nearly melted. After all that fuss was out of the way I resumed my Japanese. I looked up some Japanese picture books to memorize the characters better and to get a better grip on grammar. I didn't get to the grammar part, but it really helped me with remembering the Hiragana characters and some Katakana characters. There were only a few words on each page, and there weren't that many pages. I loved it. For the rest I watched a few more episodes of Lost Girl which was fun.

When the sun had set I decided to work on some screenplay for my movie. I was inspired by the song 'Marriage D'amour' by George Davidson, which is actually derived from Chopin's 'Spring Waltz'. They are practically identical. It has a beautiful melodies played by the piano. I also found a violin version but I liked the piano versions better. While listening to the music I sketched a scene of a couple sitting around a campfire, and the guy asks the girl to dance. They then dance under the stars to the Spring Waltz. Probably super clichee, but I really like it so far. It might be that Lost Girl is influencing me with all the romance involved in that show.

Today was quite a productive, if only slightly boring day. Nothing besides studying, writing, drawing, and watching Lost Girl. Of course all with music, save for the series watching. I wanted to watch the newest episode of Naruto Shippuden, but it wasn't there. There's supposed to be a new episode every Thursday, which it is, but nope.

I managed to make scrambled eggs without any burnt pieces today. I'm like super proud because normally I always burn eggs when I try to frie them. Once they go black they never go back, unfortunately. I tried to sell my last piece of cake to my sister, but she didn't want to buy it. Now it's sitting on my bureau next to the shoe boxes that I use as targets during knife throwing and archery. 
I really need to wash my work outfit. I have to work again on Saturday, but if I'm quick I could get it dry before that, hopefully.

It’s Teusday evening. And. I. Passed, jay.

Today I had to turn in my books and I received my rapport. My mentor Mr Lier gave me a big wet kiss - on the cheek - when he handed over my list. First I thought I was late, which I actually was - sort of but not entirely - but luckily half my class was still present along with my super awesome mentors.

It's 10:46 and I'm listening to the amazing cover of "Now we are free" by Taylor Davis. I've been binging on the series "Lost Girl" for the past few days and man, am I hooked on that show. To think that they can stuff so much sass in 45 minutes is beyond me, and I love it. I might take a liking to a certain short bartender in the series - which is by no means entirely romantic - and I'm past the halfway mark on season two.

It's bloody hot today, I thought I would melt. I'm actually still thinking that while I'm sitting like a ... bedpotatoe(?) in my bed right now. I would leave my window open for ventilation, but I'm scared of the insects. Mosquitos in particular, those are nasty.

At 14:30 I hooked up with my friend Katinka to go to the local fair. Unfortunately, she also brought her dad and little brother. It was something I wasn't counting on. The best thing about the fair is by most the churros. By a long shot, really. Those things are divine. I didn't get any today, though. I wanted to go for fries with mayo since it just hit me like 'I want fries with mayo...' that I wanted to march to the local snackbar the moment me and my friend parted ways. Instead I went home, asking if my mom wanted fries too as the good person I can be - my sister wasn't home - but to my great horror she said that all the snack bars are closed today. Later I found out that they aren't but then I had already stuffed my face with lasagna. Not complaining about that, though.

A lot has happened lately, I think. My brains are a bit fuzzy, and I might have found out why that is. The nasty little shit called B12 deficiency. Apparently you can go blind from it get dementia. That might explain my difficulties in remembering past events. Hell, I don't even know what I did last week and I'm mixing things up. Thinking that something that was said today was said yesterday, or a week ago. It's pretty messed up. That is why I'm getting back to writing this little journal. To document my memories so they won't be lost forever.

The whole concern really started when I actually forgot that I had turned in a practical assignment for computer science. I had turned it in, but it was never received by my teacher, so he filled in an F. All this time I had forgotten that I turned it in after all, causing me a great deal of shit. I remembered because of the word 'Struktograaf' while I was taking a shower, completely with the whole widening of the eyes and gaping mouth. It must have looked hilarious. It felt like when Dory in 'Finding Nemo' remembered all her lost memories after she had forgotten about them, completely with the flashbacks and all. Most of all, I felt stupid, and perhaps a bit concerned that I forgot something so important in the first place. It doesn't matter anymore now, though. I passed and even after I told my teacher that I did make it and send the file to him, he wouldn't change the mark because I didn't make the accompanying assignments that went with the end project. Oh well.

I have been practicing my knife throwing, and now I can hit something from like three meters with the no spin technique. The spin technique isn't something for me. My floor is a mess. There's rubble everywhere and chipped pieces of wood from the wooden board I've been using as a target. Today I sneaked the bow and arrow from behind my mom's television in her room and mended the bend arrow points. I bought that old thing a few years back on Queens day and it had been collecting dust all this time behind my mom's television. She hid it for me, saying it's dangerous. I tried a few shots with it and discovered that my aim is terrible. I accidentally embedded an arrow five centimeters in the wall. And the chair. And other stuff. Besides knife throwing and archery I've also been trying my luck at trying to learn Japanese. The language itself seems easy enough, it's the writing that's been killing me. There are like 2000 Kanji characters. 2000. I think that one of these days I'm going to cry because of that. Luckily I can procrastinate on the Kanji characters for a while. First I'm going to learn Hiragana, which has like 48 characters and Katakana. Hiragana, Katakana and Kanji are the three major writing systems in Japan. I even bought a traditional Japanese book. Backwards and all!

Last Sunday was Braderie. It's like a market day with little shops - mostly commercial - placed along a very long street that begins at the supermarket 30 meters from my house, and ends at around the local theater; the Schouwburg. The night before I had been binging on Lost Girl till four in the morning, so I was practically comatose till around 2 PM. I had totally forgotten there was braderie that day. I got the information from my neighbors when I was overhearing their conversation from below my window. I had opened it for some fresh air. I quickly got dressed and in the process dragged my sister with me to check out the stalls. That's where I got the Japanese book.

There was this old guy who was selling this holy mother load of books. They were all mighty expensive, but I threw in my womanly charms and innocence to sway him in giving us a discount. 17.50 was the price we agreed on for three books. First the guy wanted like 25 Euros. My sister and I were like 'Hell naaaaw'. Luckily we had a win win situation. She bought two books on medical stuff. After that we got a family bag of churros which we ate all by ourselves. I certainly felt slightly vile after that. Worth it, though.

For my scription next year I'm going to make a movie. This is possible because I have the subject Art in my schedule, which is totally awesome. I know that one other kid from my art class is also going to make a movie, so I'll have to talk to him after the holiday is over. To see what he got. I asked him before, but he didn't know what kind of movie he was going to make back then. I, on the other hand, do. I'm going to make a movie about a student who failed her 4th year in high school, and in her exam year she is going to take revenge on everybody who fucked her. That's it in big lines. I was greatly inspired by the movie Kill Bill. Kill Bill is a master piece. I already started on a script and screenplay. It'll be epic. I am concerned though and full of doubts. Sometimes I think that I won't be able to pull it off. That I don't have enough time, or the necessary recourses. I even considered changing to a completely different plan, like studying the Japanese writing arts. For now I am going to go on. I really want to do this thing. If only to prove that I can.

The last couple of days I've found a lot of cool new soundtracks and songs that I have added to my collection. I also found back something that I thought I lost. There was this video of a cover of a Naruto Shippuden soundtrack by the name "Obito Death Theme". It was basically a metal cover of the song with several improvisations and the most beautiful piano opening. One day when I wanted to listen to it again on Youtube, it was gone. The user who uploaded the video had ended his Youtube account. I searched and searched. I even contacted a band that had the same username as the guy on Facebook, but to no success. I made a Twitter account just to stalk the actual guy when I found him, but he hasn't replied back yet, probably never will. When I thought all hope was lost, I found the bloody cover in my play list. Apparently I had saved it to my computer after all, but I had forgotten I had. It was a pleasant surprise. I might upload it myself now. Such a beautiful cover should not be lost to the world. Mr Van der Kamp made me go to the gym, saying that I had to work out for three hours if I wanted to pass. There had to be a photo as proof. I did go to a gym, yes, and I did get a photo. And then I left after 10 minutes. But he doesn't need to know that. Apparently my evil plan worked.

On July 12 I witnessed the super moon. I saw it from my window late in the evening, noticing it was slightly bigger than normal. Then I remembered there was supposed to be a super moon that very night. I thought about getting my telescope but I was afraid that bugs would fly in if I would leave my window wide open for too long. According to Wikipedia there is an other super moon this year on August 10. I think it's pretty cool, just like a red moon, or a blue moon. Shit's so fancy I'd need a second monocle.

I've been collecting quotes and other little somethings on my phone and a bit on my computer from Facebook. Right now I've got around 350 pictures of stuff. You know what they say; educating the mind without educating the heart is no education at all. Today the summer vacation officially started. 

Let's make the best of it.

Dodge Ball

I missed the first two hours of school because I was late. I woke up feeling like I had been run over my Thomas the locomotif. I got a 'late' note just in case Dirkx demanded one. The classroom where I had to go was four stairs up, not something I want to have to clime twice. Once is more than enough. I arrived at biology five minutes before the bell announced it was time to get my arse on the bike again to go to PE.

I had nearly had to stop a few times while cycling, I felt so tired. This week was Marc and Yarnie's turn to give a PE lesson. They did dodgeball. It was pretty fun if it wasn't for the occasional confusion here and there. They wanted to do a very complicated warming up and no one knew what they actually had to do.

I realised that when I get hit and end up in the field at the back, I won't get out again until someone wins. I'm rather terrible at throwing stuff, let alone in a straight line, and no one wants to give me the ball. It's frustrating beyond belief and quite depressing, but I guess if it is good for the team it must be alright. It just saddens me that people never pass me a ball or anything.

I forgot to bring my computer science books because I thought the classes got dropped because the essay that was set for today got dropped as well. No such luck, though. Fortunately we didn't need our books, we were set to work on the computers again like last week. And also just like last week, eighth period got moved to seventh period so we would be free to go earlier.

Appearantly there was decor building this day too. I can understand, though. The show is on Monday and we still have to do a couple of things till then. I walked down to meet up with everybody and they were grouped together in front of the door of our head quarters. Mr Heideman hadn't showed up yet, so we went out to find him. First we asked at the reception, and then we walked up to the second floor to see if he was in his class room. We found him a few doors down from it, talking to someone about his mentor class.

A few minutes later he emerged from the room he was in and we walked back to the head quarters that lay in the 'cellar of lockers'. Very mysterious name. We worked on some stuff, and because we were with so many I decided to leave early to go to the Plus to pick a certain something up for consumption.

I visited the Plus three times today to buy those delicious hot pockets. They are appearantly not actually called that but they're called Pigs in a Blanket. Either way, fine with me. They were sold out twice. After that I specially came back a third time to buy them because I was sure that they had them again at that moment. I bought three boxes, one for my mom and two for myself. The reason I always buy them on Thursday because they're 'day deals'. Two go for an Euro, which is like super cheap. I amanged to eat all four and a half from my mom because she was full.

 

My Minecraft server is coming along nicely if it wasn't for the fact that people can't connect to it anymore because Hamachi is being retarded. It worked fine before, but now I'm the only one that can connect. It might be my bad connection that is causing it, though. That problem will be solved when I lease a server to host it from there.

I drank some tea and ate fudge waffles while making mathematics homework. It was relatively easy to do, it just required a lot of time. I managed to get one paragraph done and half of the 'Test yourself'. My desk was just a complete mess.

My Linux laptop now had my Windows 8 laptop ontop of it, and that in turn was covered with sheets and my mathematics book. In front of that was my notebook where I wrote all the excersises in. And then I haven't even started on everything unrelated was laying around. Just to name a few things: A book; I Am Number Four, Rasphberry Pi, ton of sticky notes, notes on CSS coding, tea mug, agenda, and my bank card reader.

Because someone stole my coat yesterday I'm now wearing my brown one. It looks very fancy. It's very long and has those deep pockets. Reminds me detectives for some reason. Trenchcoats.

Well, that was my day. How was yours?

- knetterzak

Religious Essay

It's currently 11:41 as I'm writing this. I'm feeling rather tired. That Gregorius letter is laying next to me, opened. As I predicted it contains the program of the show on next Monday and Tues along with four consumption tickets to get drinks over there. Very fancy. I'll probably use only one because I'm too awkward to drink anything in public most of the time. The canteen is always pretty packed, you see.

Today was a long day. It started with biology first thing in the morning, and then Dutch class. Because I hadn't finished reading my book for a test I had to write a little something of +/- 300 words about 'the joys of forgetting' or the opposite of that. I went with the first one. It was actually pretty fun to do. I was a bit worried about the amount of words I had at the end, but luckily I had more than enough words written down.

After Dutch class it were three hours and two breaks of freedom. religion got dropped so that added up to the two standard free hours we have on every Wednesday. I stuffed my backpack in my locker and went home to work on my Minecraft server. Everything is coming along nicely and I'm certain about leasing that server now. I looked up the difference between HDD and SSD, and I'm going with HDD. My server isn't that big so it wouldn't really matter, and HDD is cheaper than SSD. I like cheaper.

I traveled back to school for an hour of chemistry with Mr Van Well and then watching a movie called Thirza, which sucks, really, at Dutch class. I've got two Dutch classes on Wednesday. How hateful. The movie sucked really hard and I'm wondering why they were even showing this to us. I wasn't even watching most of the time. My attention was on my religion study book, studying stuff for the essay that came the hour after.

The organization for the essay was a mess. They had us grouped using surnames. The whole thing of finding where we had to go took fifteen minutes of our test taking time. It was frustrating beyond belief. The test itself was rather easy. You had to give a lot of opinions, which I hate to give. I don't like people prying in my personal life. Especially not some teacher who teaches things I do not personally belief in.

Because I had an appointment with Merel at 16:00, and the essay ended at 15:55 I left in kind of a hurry. Unfortunately someone had taken or moved my jacket so I couldn't put it on during the ride. It was pretty cold. Here I was cycling in nothing but a beanie, bright pink snowboard gloves and a checkered blouse. I must have been quite a sight to behold. Mostly because my head must have been pretty red, I was breathing like I had run a marathon and my nose had opened the drains.

I arrived ten minutes late at the location. I dragged myself in and Merel and I started our little session. She gave me some assignments about social situations. At the end I told her that she was too 'text book'. She seemed to do everything by the book, nothing original. I've been feeling like an object being processed through a factory to get better or something. That's something I told her as well. Maybe it's because of my general dislike to psychologists. I'm still going to the next appointment, though. 

Well, that was my day. How was yours?

- knetterzak

Starting up a Minecraft server

I was hiding behind my door as my mom entered my room. When she saw me we both sort of had a grinning match, it was a pretty funny situation. The reason to the situation however, wasn't that funny. I slept through most of school today, again. At some point I thought about hiding in the closet, but I didn't have time to make it. I sort of froze like a deer in headlights when I heard those footsteps growing closer, and closer.

I spend the day working on setting up a Minecraft server. It's mostly up and running now and I'm thinking about hiring a dedicated server. The Minecraft server I play on now is closing in two months, so the community will be migrating to an other server. I'm using the map I used a year ago for a server I had with four other people. Unfortunately we had to close down after a few months, but I still had the map.

I got my letter today about the Gregorius Show. I haven't opened it yet but I know it contains a ticket for the show and an agenda of what's going to happen. As a member of the decor building team I always get free tickets for the first night. On the second night we are back stage loading everything into a truck right after an act is performed on stage. We also perform small on site reparations.

The show is next Monday. I won't be following classes then as we meet up at the other location to load stuff into the truck to move it to the theater building across the street. It's always a lot of stuff. Once we're done with that we get everything done in the theater, like getting everything in place and such. Now I think about it, I'm getting nervous about remembering how to everything again. I don't want to look stupid after four years of service.

I watched Hunger Games Catching Fire with my mom this evening while eating noodles. I was constantly holding back information about what they didn't show in the movie but what was in the book, which was hard. It was disappointing to see that they left some stuff out I was looking forward to seeing on screen. I also imagined the characters quite differently than how they were portrayed in the movie.

For the evening I derped on my Minecraft server with some friends, adding shop signs and generating some terrain. Because my map was from 1.6.4 it had a defined border where the new chunks began. First I thought it was the world going corrupted again, but it was just the new terrain from the newer version; 1.7.2.

Well, that was my day. How was yours?

- knetterzak

Today is Monday?

I was almost late. Hence the word almost, though. I woke up at 7:28 by a door slamming close downstairs. It it wasn't for someone's violent act I would have missed mathematics. I got dressed really quickly and managed to get there in time. To top off my initial lateness; I spend twenty minutes talking to someone from Australia over Skype while putting on my trousers and throwing books in my backpack.

You remember how I said I had so much free time last night? I had all the time in the world, really. Apparently not enough time to read two page numbers properly. this particular turn of events rewarded me a two in mathematics by Mr Moelker himself. I read the page numbers wrong, causing me to make the wrong homework. I felt so screwed over, I just wanted to throw a tantrum right there, flipping all the sheets and stuff into the air like a fuming toddler. Luckily for my suppressed indignity I avoided such situations. Barely.

During biology Dirkx was talking about something, but I wasn't really paying attention to it because I missed the first part. I was just casually reading my book when all heads turned to me. Dirkx kind of swooped over to be able to see my face, looking expectant of me. Most awkward moment of the day, that was. He had asked me a question about meioses, but I didn't know that. I said I had only heard the ending, and then everybody made dramatic sounds like it was I just revealed the ending of an epic tale to a very dramatic love story or something. Genius.

Art class was boring apart from the fact that Birgit and I went on an adventure of epic proportions. What we actually did was taking photographs of cracks in the pavement and stains. It wasn't much of an adventure until I decided to make a mad dash out of an ally like a fool. That was fun. I should almost have enough material to finish that project for next Monday. I only need to do a few more things until everything is done.

Surprisingly enough did Mr Lier not talk about any of his 'dates'. Maybe I wasn't paying enough attention, though. I did catch him insulting us in English, saying he could just call us whatever he wants because we wouldn't understand shit anyway. He's mostly right about that, though. I 'Oi'd!' him on multiple occasions because of this.

I fought with Marc over a pencil because he stole it from me. It escalated quickly and he nearly toppled me over my table, my chair along side me. I pushed him in the face because he scratched my hand. Now I have a little scratch on my right hand. He stole it because he didn't have a pencil, so I let him borrow it for the next hour.

We didn't do anything, like literally nothing during social studies. It was boring beyond anything. Mrs Twilhaar looked like shit, too. I shouldn't be saying that but she really looked like she had known better days. Maybe it's because of her pregnancy, I don't know. she looked really tired and pale. We spend the hour talking in amongst our democratic group; the NNP. We have three members: Marc, Yarni and me.

Because physics got dropped no one went. No one but me. I scored very low for my last test so I went to Mr Endert to ask for help. He explained everything to me and as he was looking at my answers again he actually added a few extra points because I was right on the last questions, but in a different context. My mark went from a 3.3 to a 5, something I think is quite a feat for just dropping by to ask for help. I think he partly did it because I seem to be the only one dedicated enough to actually show up to ask questions and I'm one of the few people who do homework, but that could just be me. 

I couldn't stop grinning like an idiot on my way home. I thought he would think me a fool, which he probably did, but it wasn't awkward at all. It actually got me 1.7 extra points on my mark, making me a very happy person.

My friend Birgit is writing this awesome story called The Specials and I've read the first chapter, and I'm loving it. I also finished reading this Doctor Who fan fiction, which was very funny to read through. It's called Keeping The Stars Apart and I highly recommend it. It's the sequel to Starlight, so I suggest you read that first if you want to know what is actually going on all the time. It's filled with a lot of humor and I absolutely loved reading both stories.

There was this moment when I felt really weird. It was Monday. I felt so weird because I thought it was anything but Monday. And then there it is: Monday. I also heard that today was Blue Monday, which I can relate to. Ugh, mathematics. Is it that I hate myself that I do this sort of stuff, or is someone sabotaging my life?

I've had my cup of tea and my daily dose of literature. Time to face plant my bed.

Well, that was my day. How was yours?

- knetterzak

Doctor Who Sunday

I just watched two Doctor Who episodes, the ones with the Master in it with the year that never was.  I've already seen it multiple times but still, it's awesome. I think the Master is a very interesting character and I'd love to see more of him. Tomorrow I'm going to see The End of Time, also with the Master.

I spend the majority of my Sunday doing nothing productive. I woke up from a very freaky dream at around three PM, and actually got out of bed at somewhat around four. I took a shower, ate something downstairs, and did my mathematics homework. I also mailed Merel those three social test situations where I would have to do social interactions to help me with that crap. And this all before the clock said it was even ten o'clock in the evening. 

This left me plenty of time to do more unproductive stuff, like playing guitar and watching Doctor Who. I wouldn't call that unproductive though; Doctor Who is one of the most awesome shows out there and playing guitar makes me look badass. 

I pulled out my guitar from it's cover to jump right into learning how to play Archangel from Two Steps From Hell, but one of my strings had apparently broken over time while it was sitting in the corner of my room. Of course that had to happen on the precise moment that I wanted to use the thing. I had not played on it for months, and now I wanted to play on it it was not functional. That really sucks, I was all motivated and stuff. I will have to get that string fixed again. I still want to learn how to play Archangel. It's a badass song.

When I had finished all my homework I felt pretty weird. Normally I'm always short on time, but this evening I had more than three hours left to do absolutely nothing productive. It was so weird, I didn't know what to do first. I should keep a list for these rare occasions so I've got stuff to keep me busy. Now I think about it, I could have done laundry. 

Ironically, I still haven't watched Ripper Street, or eaten that popcorn. During Doctor Who I was stuffing my face with waffles. Yum, waffles.  

My heart sunk when I saw my physics mark from that test which I mistook for a test test, so  not an actual test but a test to know if you know the stuff for the real test. But it was the real test so, derp. I scored a 3,3. That is a very low number, and I wasn't very happy with it. Mr Endert must think I'm pretty stupid, and he would be right.

I felt really productive today. The only thing I'm worried about for tomorrow is art class. We had to make photographs of cracks in the pavement, but seriously, what's up with cracks in the pavement? Sometimes the subject can seem so retarded that I'm wondering why I took it. I want to learn how to draw, not make photographs of cracks in the pavement. Can't they think of better things to teach kids these days?

I'm sure that when I lay in my bed, ready to doze off to sleep I'll come up with the best ideas ever, but I wouldn't be bothered to write them down so they will be lost forever like last night. Why can't my brains be brilliant when I'm actually functioning properly instead of being in a near vegetate state of being half asleep? Maybe my brains are just retarded, that would explain so much.

Well, that was my day. How was yours?

- knetterzak

Relaxed Work Day

Work was delightfully plain. The blue crates were finished in no time and for the rest I cleaned the canteen a bit. We finished right on time, too. Today was by far the easiest Saturday in months. Probably because we were with so many and there weren't that many customers. Fenna and Svenna helped me with the blue crates for a bit.

Every time someone touches my crates I feel like that person is stealing away my job. Probably childish but that's how I feel about it. I know I'm not the only one doing it, yes, but it is sort of my thing. The thing I do every Saturday. It's my task to get the job done, to get all the crates checked. At the end of the day they will look at me if something got messed up along the way, not to the other people who helped me doing it.

Svenna had to go early so that left Mick, Fenna, Anke, and Jolien. I walked out with Svenna, thinking we were all going to walk out, but then the door closed behind me. That was quite a 'Dafuck' moment. After looking stupid for a few seconds I marched back inside. Solidarity till the end.

Mick had to give off the keys of the place to Marlot, one of the managers (in training). The problem was that he didn't know where she lived. Luckily, I do know where she lives. So when we departed he handed me the keys and I delivered them through her mailbox. She lives really near me, I just had to get ten Meters off my usual route.

I put my bike in the shed, at last, much to my mom's joy. After that I chatted for a bit and then I retreated upstairs to my room. After about half an hour my mom called dinner was being served. It was very fancy  dinner: baked potatoes, cheese filled chicken and peas.

My sister showed me her game that she 'made'. She didn't really make it, but more or less changed things from a pre-made something. It was part of a school project sort of deal called 'Giving Back'. It's a program with students getting mentors that have the profession that they want to pursue. It's mighty fancy. I thought about participating but I figured I would lack the motivation to show up for their meetings.

I'm currently sitting here, very late, or early, it's just the way you would call 3 AM in the morning, in my room listening to soundtracks from Doctor Who and this anime. I think it's time for me to face plant my bed.

I still have to watch Ripper Street and eat that popcorn.

Well, that was my day. How was yours?

- knetterzak

Just. Run.

 I feel like running. Doesn't matter where, just away from here. This feeling in my stomach, what is it? Anxiety. It's  taking over my body. I want to run. Away. away from here. To a place where they can not find me. Where all my worries will be non existent. Where no one will look for me. Away, away from here. All this because of my own stupidity. If I wouldn't be such an idiot all the time I wouldn't be in this situation.

It feels as if my body is cannibalizing itself. A continues nagging in the pit of my stomach. It makes my body tremble in terror. I need to run, now. Away. I will just leave everything behind and run. One quick bathroom break and I'm gone. Gone forever, where no one will ever find me.
 

And run I did.

I had a mental derp down when I was checking my absence records. I panicked and might have suddenly thrown on a hat, scarf and gloves and made a mad dash for my bike. It was standing at the front, conveniently. My mom was really surprised why I wanted to go out at eight PM in the rain while I normally don't even leave the house during daytime. I plainly told her that I was just going for a ride. Why is it so hard to understand that I have no hidden motives as a seventeen year old on Friday night?

I took off in a random direction, not caring where I'd end up. The rain should have annoyed me, but it didn't. I actually thought it looked kind of beautiful, reflecting the light coming from buildings and street lights in a fancy manner. For a person who can't even do three push ups I was amazingly fast on wheels. That could have been the panick, though.

I went here and there, cycling through all the dark streets. I also went by the old water tower that's positioned within twenty Meters from my school. For some reason I always end up there if I go for late night bike adventures. I felt like the only thing that I could control in my life on that moment was when I wanted to go. That might sound a bit silly, but it was awfully reassuring.

This went on for about half an hour until I calmed down. I decided to go back home because my energy levels were reduced to nothing. When I stepped back into the living room my mom paused the movie she was watching with her friend Cora, who had stayed for dinner and stuff. She still didn't buy my innocent story. I wouldn't even believe my story, but sometimes I have my bright moments. In one of those bright moments I snapped a picture of the water tower to convince her of my crap story. Unfortunately my mom didn't know we had a water tower, but Cora explained the building to her.

I changed into my favorite evening attire and sipped tea from my favorite cup. I laid my cloths to dry around my room. I felt really tired that moment. Also a bit like I had been run over by a steamroller, but that could have been the fact that I couldn't feel my legs anymore due to the cold.

Why I was in such a panic? I woke up at one PM, and no, I didn't have the first five hours off. At least my mom didn't yell at me. I thought about going to Decor building, but decided against it. I felt tired, really tired. I hope this B12 shot starts working soon.

I have to work something, something I'm honestly not looking forward to right now. Maybe that is why they call it 'work'. I don't want to talk to people. I want to curl up in a ball and sleep.

I still have to send a mail to Merel with the three assignments I have to conjure up on overcoming my social awkwardness. I keep procrastinating it. I think Merel doesn't like me, or trust me. I just get a weird feeling when I talk to her, like something isn't right. Last session she practically laughed at me. Right in my face, when I tried to tell her my problems. I'm easily offended and can't take jokes very well. Maybe that's when I really started having issues with her.  

I read a few chapters from 'I Am Number Four' and a few chapters from a Doctor Who fan fiction I'm reading, and a few chapters from a Sherlock fan fiction I'm reading. Quite good reading material.  

Now is the moment I'm going to face plant on my pillow and hug it like it's my baby. It's a very nice pillow.  

Well, that was my day. How was yours?

- knetterzak

Hot Pockets

I got my shot today. The doctor's assistant, or more the lady behind the counter, gave it to me. I went with my mom because she had to get her shot too, and because I was scared shitless. It was actually hurt more after the shot than during it, which strikes me as odd, really. But that could just be me.

Today was my time to shine during PE. I came fifteen minutes early and made this whole plan on paper which, if I must say so myself, sucked and would probably have failed with flying colors, but luckily Tamara showed u. She had this whole thing planned out and she filled me on the rules of the sport. We also talked about who was going to say what.

It went quite well. People were calm although this kid from our class kept treating the smaller handballs like footballs. That boy is such an annoying brat, not just during PE. I did the introduction and the warming up, and Tamara did the exercises and explained the rules with me. We had a couple of matches with three groups of five people. Tamara joined one of those teams while I picked up the whistle, acting as referee. 

At the end the PE teacher graded Tamara with 'Great', and I was graded as 'Fine'. I thought it was so unfair, although I knew it was maybe a bit fair. I wanted to have a 'Great' Too, but noooo I get a 'Fine'. I did 'Fine', not great. I have high standards of myself and I can't stand the idea that someone did better than me while I tried just as hard. It's no my fault I've never held a handball before and that we went with her plan and not mines, making it appear as if she did all the work.

I cycled home to dump my training clothes and then I did something really stupid. I dumped the stuff on the table and walked out of the door, closing it behind me. When I reached for my pocket I made the shocking discovery that I had just locked myself out of my own house. I couldn't unlock my bike either. After some general gestures of "I'm stupid" frustrated gestures I readjusted my bag and abandoned my bike.

On my way I also picked up the book I ordered from the Bruna. Honestly I expected it to be bigger, but I love it none the less. It's called 'I Am Number Four' From the Lorien Legacies. I already read the introduction chapter and I am now at the beginning of chapter one. I think I'm going to read a few pages every evening before I go to bed after sipping my tea. That would be such a fancy ritual. Very classic, the whole "Sipping my tea and reading a book before bed" thing.

I arrived 15 minutes late and my bag was killing me. It's pretty heavy. I explained it to the janitor and he wouldn't give me a note saying "Late with reason". I was so dignified. The one time I have a reason to be late he won't give me a note. I ended the conversation before I was going to yell at him because it is actually a really nice man. I took off up the stairs and he called "And please take off your hat!" behind me. It didn't improve my mood.

I reached classroom 670; the computer classroom and the place where I had computer science that hour, and they had left the door wide open. There went my silent approach. I stood there awkwardly for just a second, then I walked in. I saw Mr Endert entering the hallway after me, eyeing me with a surprised expression. 

I'm always a saint in the classroom so it generally surprises teachers when they see my record on getting late. I did tell him 'I am always late' on Monday, though. I sometimes see him in the hallway at the top floor where I have biology, computer science and art when I'm late. Makes me wonder what he was doing there.

Computer science was frustrating today. We had to do some stuff and I didn't get. When I was almost finished with the assignments, we already had to begin with the practical assignment. It was also arranged that instead of waiting an hour for the next computer science lesson we got it right after the first one so we would be free one hour earlier. Normally we would be having physics that hour, but it got dropped from the schedule because of reasons previously mentioned.

I didn't get to finish my assignments, or the practical assignment. At the end I was really frustrated because the practical assignment was so unclear and we had two classes in one classroom the last hour and it was just total chaos. I couldn't ask Mr Elsenaar anything because he was preoccupied with the other class and watching YouTube videos on fast cars. Those two hours were the most unproductive hours of today, unfortunately. The subject we are dealing with is great, though. We're working with programming now, which is mighty fancy.

After the bell rang we evacuated the classroom. I wasn't happy with the fact that I would have to walk home again with a backpack that weights a ton. I stopped at the Plus and got myself two hot pockets for one euro. The Plus has these special standard offers on particular day. Today was 'hot pocket' day. I ate the warm meal under the cover of the nearby cinema. It was raining and I didn't want my food to go soggy on me.

I stood there, eating my hot pockets and suddenly this old couple walks up to us. I was not the only one with the idea of 'Hey, let's take cover at the cinema because it's raining', there were three other people with me. This couple tries to open the doors to the cinema, but they're locked. Apparently it was going to open in twenty minutes or so at half four. I initially thought it was just closed today.

The hot pocket were amazing. I loved them so much that I went back for a second pair. I put these in my backpack and hurried home to eat them there. It was still raining and I didn't want to stand under the cover again. Thirty minutes later I rang the bell and no one opened the door. I unpacked my hot pockets and started munching on one of them. It was still raining, but I didn't care. My bike was still standing where I left it.

My mom opened the door for me after she got back from whatever she got back from. I gave her a bite from my hot pockets and showed her my new book. She thought it was a pocket edition. It does sort of look like it. I ate my hot pockets and then ascended the stairs to my room. After doing something I can't remember I went to bed to take a short nap. turned out that short nap was six hours. I hope that B12 injection will take effect soon.

I read some fanfiction, drank some tea, munched on some biscuits, well actually quite a lot of biscuits, and listened to music. I still have to do mathematics for tomorrow, but I'm just too tired. I'm going to bed now.

Well, that was my day. How was yours?

- knetterzak

Fashionably Late

I was late today because I wanted to finish some snacks in utter peace. Meaning I was as slow as a snail. I was downstairs at five past eight, which left me more than enough time. Then I lost five minutes doing my eyes brows, and ten minutes eating. It was worth it though, it was one of the most relaxed mornings I've had in weeks. No rushing, just calm and relaxed. Unfortunately the janitor wasn't very understanding.

I've been feeling tired the entire day. It took me some time to find Mr Dirkx in the right classroom. No matter what the time tables say, he will always be in the same classroom. I should have known that when I went downstairs to say that he wasn't at classroom 630, but instead I had to be an ignorant fool sporting hope on getting rid of my record on getting late. It didn't get me off from yet one hour of detention again, it only caused me to become more tired because I had to walk six stairs up and down, twice. I don't recommend that with a backpack that weights a ton.

Mr Dirkx explained how we don't be having biology tomorrow because he has a DNA something with higher classes, and he will be giving information on his subject; biology, to 3rd graders. It's part of the 'Choose Wisely' program. I remember it from last year when I was a 3rd grader. It's really cool. You get to select a list of classes you would like to have information on, and then you can follow an hour, or two hours of those classes. 

I went to computer science, art, geography, French, German, biology, applied mathematics, history, physics, hell I went to almost every one of them. This was mostly because I was bored and just joined classes that weren't on my time table. Initially my time table had three original subjects I could attend: computer science, applied mathematics, and biology.

It's funny that I attended German and French because I hate either one of them. I choose to do the German class because it was right across the classroom where I had just attended either French or geography and because Mr Linckens was giving it. He was my old German teacher before he went to an other school. I choose French because they were singing songs and doing puzzles. Mostly the music, though. 

The physics and applied mathematics classes were absolutely packed. They were up to the door. I'm so happy I got to attend both of them. It was mighty fancy, although applied mathematics was rather boring. We just got a piece of paper with some crap on it. Applied mathematics was with magnets and shit. Mighty fancy.

But enough about my wild adventures of the past. As usual I had two free hours which I used to make the chemistry homework of today and listen to music. Ramona accompanied me and we shared a computer. It was fun.

I had religion after my free hours, and I hate it. The teacher is nice, but the subject, just no. I'm no religious myself and the classes are boring so there is not much for me in it. I just sat my arse down and did some physics, much to Mr Moon's objections. We had to make a summary of a text, and I had marked the important areas, so which he said wasn't enough. 

Then when we were about to discuss our answers he strolled over to Marc, who sits next to me and said his work was perfect. And this was while he had marked the text too, even worse than me. When I called my religion teacher out on it he looked pretty busted but he recovered rather quickly. He says Marc's work is superb while he did less than me, and whines about me not doing enough? No, just no. He knew I was pissed.

I don't know how I keep managing this, but I survived yet an other chemistry lesson of Mr Van Well. This time with a story on political party members with a stomach bypass who can't drink just a few sips of alcohol without getting drunk immediately. We were discussing the Lethal Dose 50% and PPM levels in various substances, like alcohol.

I feel bad about procrastinating on watching Ripper Street. I want to eat popcorn and watch good TV, but I'm too much of a procrastinating derp. I did do some laundry today and cleaned my room. It looks fancy yet again. Also, the Bruna left a voicemail message to my dead phone that is now recharging saying that the book I ordered came in! I'm going to pick it up tomorrow before I go to school.

I have to get my B12 injection tomorrow, not something I'm looking forward to. At least I have the book that can cheer me up. I have the first three hours because Mr Van Well takes part in the 'Choose Wisely' program too, giving information on his subject: chemistry. Dirkx's classes drop too, and adding those two to an initial first free hour it allows me to stay in bed till ten if I want to.

Tomorrow is my time to shine as a stand-in PE teacher giving two hours of handball. Something I know nothing about. I'm a duo with Tamara, a girl from my class who plays the sport, and the one who suggested it, but she has been sick the past two days. I hope she shows up tomorrow, otherwise I'm pretty fucked. Before I leave home tomorrow I'm going to conjure up a great scheme on how to nail two hours of perfect PE without it ending in absolute failure. On the bright side; I don't have to do a thing myself. No warming ups, no nothing. Just a few of demonstrations and I can sit my arse down whistling a flute as referee.

It's one past midnight and I've stuffed my face with biscuits and enjoyed myself with two cups of tea. A good ending to this day if I say so myself. I read a bit of Sherlock fan fiction, vacuum cleaned my drawers and have the prospect of some good reading material tomorrow. Yeah, a good ending to this day. 

Too bad I burned my bacon strips. I just remembered that. They were more black than brown when I set my teeth in it. Not a grand success. My sister did make them perfectly, though. I shouldn't have taken my eyes of mine. Poor bacon strips. Also, I made a deal with someone in the online Minecraft community. Now he has to like all my posts and leave a comment on every single one of them. Glorious.

Well, that was my day. How was yours?

- knetterzak

Sandwich in the shades

What I forgot to mention yesterday, the reason that I was rattling on about my physics teacher; Mr Endert all that time, was because of the following: I asked him what the weirdest thing was that he encountered in the classroom. His answers made me bent double in a fit of laughter. I did so not expect that. Apparently it so happened to be that there was a sandwich hanging in the shades when he entered the class room. I did not expect that. It sounded better when he said it; in such an incomprehensible tone with a hint of amusement. Hilarious.

He also told of an incident with a dripping orange hanging from the broken frames of a painting in the back of the class room. Someone seemingly so threw an orange at the painting, breaking the glass frame, and thereby leaving the fleshy orange dripping juice from the back of the room. It's hard to comprehend that people do such things. The one that that really had me puzzled about this curious case of "What the actual fuck?" was how they managed to do it. A glass frame is pretty strong, and breaking it with a bloody orange must have required quite a lot of muscle power. Also the fact that it was an orange. A bloody orange.

I was almost late for Dutch class this morning when I once again procrastinated on rolling out of bed. I for to drink tea all together as I threw stuff in my school bag, conjuring up a plan on how I was going to survive mathematics 6th period. I didn't have my homework and from past experiences I want to avoid that in case of repeating unfortunate events regarding Mr Moelker and my homework, or better said, lack of said homework.

I've been making mathematics homework throughout the day. I did it while we were watching the movie Thirza during Dutch class, and during Mr Van Well's disturbing chemistry classes where he had a rant on religion, but not during social studies. During social studies we began with that project where we have to form our own political group and work towards an end debate of epic proportions. Probably nothing special but I like to think of it as this fierce battle between two great world powers, and the winner will be able to change the course of history. I've been watching too many political orientated movies, I guess.Our political group is called NNP, standing for 'Nederlandse natioliste partij' (='Dutch Nationlistic Party').

Going into politics seems rather interesting to me. I might give it a try in the future. Starting from the bottom by joining a political group, and working my way up from there. It's something else entirely from being a scientist but it's something to hold into consideration if everything else fails.

Mr Lies, my English teacher with the many dates, told us that he was dumped today. Poor man. He also suggested to go to a movie sometime with the whole class. Not during school time then because no one will behave then with flying crisps and chewing gum everywhere. He has a very valid point. If people go there on their own free will they are much more motivated not to behave like a band of immature kids. I think it's a wonderful idea. 

When I entered the classroom 545; Mr Linckens' old classroom and the place where we had the privilege to have mathematics, Mr Moelker suddenly said "You are number one" when I stepped into the classroom. It was a bit weird until he began giving other people numbers too. We worked in groups that hour discussing today's homework. Luckily I had finished my homework throughout the day, working during class and breaks. If that isn't dedication.

Ruella was kind enough to let me borrow one of her fancy maps where I could put my art essay in to make it look mighty fancy. We were waiting for Mr De Light at the Dean's office. Mr De Light is besides my art teacher, also a dean. He has is an office and all, pretty fancy. I turned in my art essay and I hope it's decent enough. I analyzed a painto of Monet: A Bouguet of Sunflowers. I choose that painting because I made it in 3rd grade for art class. Eventually it got auctioned for around 35 Euros. Mr Van der Kamp has it standing in his office now.

You can see my old economy teacher, Mr De Graaf, holding a microwave standing behind the person holding the painting. Marc is sitting at the table writing down the bids. At that time he had a broken arm. After the auctions Mr Van der Kamp shaved off his beard, something his wife was so pissed about it. He did he because the auctions brought up quite a lot of money.

While I was on the road I thought about checking if my book has come in yet at the Bruna. I was cycling past it but I didn't go inside. They would call me if they had it, which is probably on Thursday.

I took a five hour long nap after getting home. It was really weird because I wasn't really asleep. I had music on the entire time and I constantly dozed off. I even had this weird dream which I can't remember now I'm trying to recall it. But it was weird. I had some pee soup, and took two bags of popcorn with me upstairs. They still have to be micro waved. Now I have a mighty fancy microwave I can do it in my room! It will be grand.

I was planning on making some while watching Ripper Street. I still haven't seen episode one yet. I think I'm going to do it an other time. Maybe in a couple of days. I have a religion essay tomorrow. I have two free hours tomorrow in the middle of my schedule so that gives me more than enough time to study a bit and make my chemistry homework.

Thursday is my time to shine during PE as a stand-in teacher. Our PE teacher, Mrs Van Dijk, is making us give lessons of choice in duos. I hope my PE buddy will be there. Tamara wasn't there today and we still have to discuss who is going to do what. We're going to give a lesson on hand ball, which I know nothing about. Seems like someone has some studying to do.

I'm going to drink a cup of tea and then go to bed again. I feel so tired, I really need to get those B12 shots again for my own sake. If only I wasn't such a procrastinating chicken I would have gotten my medication weeks ago. But then again, who would I be if not a procrastinating tea loving nerdy whining bastard?

I also have to start doing some laundry again. The game is back on with new laundry to wash!

Well, that was my day. How was yours?

- knetterzak

Unfortunate mathematical outcome

I felt like a zombie this morning. I dragged myself out of bed and rushed out of the door to mathematics first thing in the morning. Ain't that a joy? I went to bed at 2 AM last night and I hadn't done a single thing this weekend. This unfortunate string of events lead to me getting a three for mathematics when Mr Moelker was shuffling around the classroom checking everybody's homework. I was so fucked. Of all dates he checks our homework it has to be today. I could have cried that moment.

Mr Dirkx was slightly late for class. My classmates had already run off downstairs because well, they take every chance they can get to avoid classes. I just stayed put, all alone. One minute after they left Dirkx appeared from the Beta lab. I was just standing there a bit awkwardly going like "Hi, yeah I'm the only one here, hehe." Dirkx called to the reception and after a short while the others joined us too. We spend the hour working by ourselves. I made potential test questions to stamp the stuff in my head. I really want to score good on this test after the failure they call my Essay. A five, a bloody five!

It could have just been me, but I noticed that Dirkx isn't as friendly as he once was to me. Was it because I failed my essay? It was probably nothing but my own insecurities that I'm being derpy like that. It makes me feel a bit less wanted. It's probably nothing, though.

During biology Marc told me that Mr Endert's classes got dropped today because the poor man has been overworking himself. Mr Endert is a really kind man, and we have common interests, so I feel sorry for him. At that point the situation was still rather vague for me. I had no idea what was going on.

Art class was actually quite boring today. We weren't doing anything productive, really. I was just chatting for a bit with my friend Birgit the whole time, doodling some Manga characters in my dummy; a blank book specially used by art students. We call it a dummy. Mine's like gigantic compared to all the other dummies, it barely fits in my bag. Fortunately for me Mr De Ligt told me I could turn in the art assignment tomorrow because I didn't have it tomorrow. At least that part went well, unlike mathematics. 

We migrated with a small part of our big group to an other spot during the break. It sort of just happened. Katinka took the lead and walked upstairs and we stayed there. If you have the entrance to my school, you can go up one grand staircase and you come at a midsection with restrooms and radiators on both sides. We hang around at the left radiator now. 

It was actually my old spot from last year where I hung out with my friend Ruella. I asked her to join us for the second break, but she never did. Ever since we went to separate classes our friendship has been deteriorating and I have the strong feeling that we have drifted apart. She now hangs out with a classmate called Ramona. I have been replaced, I guess.

Katinka didn't know who Mr Endert was. I was discussing the subject of the dropped classes with Marc and she was like "What, who is that?". Then I saw him walking downstairs and asked him about whether physics was a go or not. He told me that he wouldn't be teaching, but that we could come to ask questions. Then he went on his merry way again downstairs, probably to the teachers lounge, and then I turned to Katinka saying "Well, that was Mr Endert." She looked at me with a puzzled expression not knowing who I meant. After some wild gestures in the man's general direction she "oh'd". 

The next two hours are not really worth mentioning other than that my English teacher always says he's dating hot young woman. He's a married man in his fifties, it's hilarious. Social studies Was rather uneventful. We were talking about politic groups and their ideas. It seems like there is one group that no one can join, which is the VVD. Geert Wilders is it's sole member and also the head of it.

In the first break I had bought six croissants for two Euros since there's always this action on Monday in the Plus, allowing you to buy three croissants for an euro. Quite convenient. The less convenient thing was that there was a line that reached to the back of the store. Katinka had gone with me and we had to wait quite a while until it was our turn. We both had the same thought of just eating the food while standing in line since it would take forever. However, we contained ourselves.

I was munching on croissants during the second break on the same spot, which now seems to be our permanent spot, I guess. Katinka had bought those giant chocolate muffins. I was debating whether I should go ask questions to Mr Endert after the break, which I eventually did. I headed upstairs and waited, and waited.

I thought he wasn't going to show up and made way to leave. Just when I wanted to open the door to the hall downstairs he was right there opening the door to go to the classroom. "Oh, ah there you are!" I said surprised. As I was expecting I was the only one who actually showed up to ask questions. I still had difficulties with some formulas and this was the perfect opportunity to ask questions. It's like private tutoring!

He commented how it was smart of me to show up and we entered the classroom. I asked him some questions on how some formulas worked and how to remember them better. Apparently you don't have to remember then since they are in BINAS, which is the most convenient thing ever. As the curious person I am I of course wanted to know how to do things the hard way, like higher classes do it. Too bad he couldn't explain it to me because it would take too much time. At least he didn't flat out refused me like Mr Moelker and Mr Bontebal. I know they mean well, but it still sucks. It makes me feel stupid.

One thing led to an other and at some point we sidetracked from the Doppler effect to computer science, to how his vacation in Pole land was and the reason of the big box of chocolate laying on his desk. He started hyperventilating today, which caused him to drop all classes for the day, and gave the class he was teaching quite a scare. That class then decided to buy him a giant box of chocolate, so sweet.

We spend one full hour talking about random stuff. Apparently there was this action for a 32 GB USB drive for 12.50 Euros at the Aldi, a grocery store of the sorts. I went there after we bid each other goodbye but it was sold out. Still, I was really proud that I managed to find it within ten minutes. I had no idea where I was going the entire time but  I managed to find it, somehow. Did I finally develop a sense of orientation? I sure hope so.

Once I was home I went upstairs and crawled in bed with all my cloths on like dead meat. On that precise moment I made the comparison to me being an addict of sleeping and if that is how addiction feels like I can understand why it's so damn hard to stop doing the thing you are addicted to it. I never imaged that feeling tired could be such an eye opener.

My mom called from downstairs after ringing me, saying that it was dinner time at around six. I heard the buzzing of my phone but I was too tired to care. It was so hard to drag my arse out of bed to go downstairs to eat. I managed it, though. My mom had made pee soup, which was quite lovely. I wasn't in the mood of eating, though. I just wanted to sleep, nothing else.

I was in such a foul mood after my mom woke me, it was horrible. I pitied my family afterwards. I fought the urge to go to sleep again, though. Instead I finished my art assignment! I spent around two hours on it, and the results are pleasing. I'm going to print it tomorrow in the school library and hand it over to Mr De Light. I was drinking Moroccan Mint through the whole thing. There is still some water left in the kettle so I know what I am going to do first thing in the morning.

After the art assignment was completed I went out to get some chocolate. I also brought a chipolata pudding back with me from the store for my mom. I still have one bar left of the two I bought for tomorrow. Tea and chocolate in the morning, something to look forward to. For the rest I got exposed to some really awesome music this evening and watched some stuff with Benedict Cumberbatch in it like 'Behind the Scenes' and 'The Graham Norton Show'. That otter meme, genius.

I had several arguments with someone online on Minecraft this evening too. The guy I was arguing with was acting like a little kid, while I know he is capable of mature behavior, and saying offending stuff I will not repeat here. I think he is just pissed off because I didn't responded with exploding joy to his stupid teasing some days earlier. Now he is convinced I hate him like an ignorant fool, it's pretty hilarious. When he started bringing up my family I was thoroughly done with him. Little shits like him are good exercises for in real life situations where someone is being stupid, childish and ignorant. Maybe he'll turn around, though. Who knows.

My room is a mess, I really have to clean it again. There is random stuff laying around everywhere. I also still have to make those book covers. Now there are pins sticking out of my couch because I couldn't put them anywhere else while I was working. I noticed them when I was walking past them. There is also a lot of silverware scattered around my room from eating lasagne and a dish from that burger I ate on Saturday. It's not made from actual silver, though. I ain't that fancy.

Well, that was my day. How was yours?

- knetterzak

Sunday's business trip

Today's business trip went splendid! A group of us gathered in front of the store to cycle to the destination given by the map, which we did. Poor Mick, a co worker, was one hour early because he read the time wrong. He had been sitting in a cafe for an hour, sipping coffee.I also wore makeup today, something I usually I don't do. I'm thinking about making a habit of it.

I cycled next to my co worker Dealan. He's a nerd, like me, which is great. We talked about anime and Doctor Who. It's great to have someone to discuss that sort of stuff with. None of my friends are much into anime and Doctor Who as I am, unfortunately.

We arrived at the parking lot where we were going to meet up and I chained my bike to a street light. Because Fenna couldn't attach her bike to a street light I linked her bike with mine. We chatted for a bit as the others arrived on either bicycles or by car. We were with quite a huge group today. Like thirty man!

At some point, when everybody was there, we got to choose a team. With a team I mean someone who you would be driving with. It's a long way from Overvecht to Hilversum, where the archery institute is, so we were leaving our bicycles behind to drive to the place.  Dealan and I got into a car with Niels, a friend of Dealan, and the person who suggested to do archery. Niels is an archer himself and shoots at the institute where we would be trying not to fail epically with a bow and arrow.

We chatted about science fiction crap and "What would you do if there was a zombie apocalypse?". It was great. We were the first ones to arrive since Niels knew exactly where it was. We waited at the parking lot for a while. We also had this funny theory how the others  might have phoned each other and that they might have stopped to discuss a plan of action on how to get there after getting horribly lost. Pretty hilarious.

 At some point the second car arrived, which contained six people. At the end we were all waiting for one more car too arrive, and everybody was pointing out how we only had three passengers while everybody else had three people stuffed in the back, and some even four people. We had by far the most relaxed ride, I think.

While we were waiting for the last car Paul was making jokes about it how they might have had an accident and how that was terrible to say and no one should say that. The irony. We also thought that they might have gotten lost. Fortunately, Joost and the others arrived a couple of minutes later.

We entered the building and got run through the safety measures and how you actually shoot with a bow. I think I did pretty well. The people walking around complimented me on my stance and looked funny at me with some sort of admiration. I might have imagined that last bit to make myself feel less awkward about it, though.

At the end of our training we had a competition. Marlot won, with as runner up Tim on second place, and Maya on third place! Dealan and I got disqualified at round three. Well, at least we had survived that far. After round four roughly 90% dropped. Archery is really hard. 

We also got to shoot on balloons, which was when shit got real. I actually got to hit my green balloon after two rounds. I felt so proud! Unfortunately, Dealan did not get to hit his balloon. Girl power for the win!

At the end Marlot, Tim, and Maya were rewarded with a cup and a bottle of champagne for first place, a smaller bottle of beer for the runner up, and a can of something for third place. Marlot got rewarded with second place, and Tim with first place because Niels accidentally mixed those two up. Marlot didn't want to trade afterwards, though. She liked her beer too much, hehe. There was also a price for the person that did worst, which was really cool in my opinion.

Niels didn't shoot while we were derping around like noobs, but at the end he, his father, and his sister did a demonstration from the distance they use during competitions. We were shooting from less than ten meters. These awesome archers were shooting from twenty meters away, shooting balloons to bits and hitting the bulls eye quite an awful lot. Then Paul made the remark that shooting from a distance must be easier if they could do it so well.

Had a drink at the archer institute and I chatted with Dealan at the bar. Every seat was taken at the tables, but at least I wasn't sitting all alone. It's already awkward enough when you don't know half of the people that are in the room. The disadvantage of only working on Saturdays.

We returned to the parking lot. While we were driving back we watched a beautiful sunset from inside the car. The sky lit up in a burning sea of orange, red, purple, and pink. It was mighty fancy. Lonneke was driving with us now because the car she was in was rather overpopulated and we had more than enough space. I couldn't help but notice that it was much more quiet in the car when she was in it. I guess no one wanted to make her feel left out while we ranted on why Dinosaurs on a space ship was not a good episode of Doctor Who. There was just no plot line what so ever! Instead we talked about the weapon law and the fact that it is legal to walk around with a bow and arrow in public.

We returned at the parking lot at around six o'clock; dinner time. There had been reservations at a very fancy restaurant for this evening. We walked there, since it was close to where we parked out bicycles. It was a fort with one meter wide walls and it had a fancy bonfire going on outside. I sat next to Dealan and we continued our conversation on anime.

When it was announced that we could go and plate up the hunting season for sea food had been opened, for me at least. I'm a big fan of fish. I actually out did Dealan in eating this evening! He was like "Where do you keep it!" and I was like "I don't know!". I had fourths. Fourths. This sort of fish stew was just so good, I just couldn't help myself. Dealan and I talked about cosplay and the commissions he and his girlfriend do. It's a pretty cool business.

We all ate ice cream when everybody was done eating; a sudden idea of Paul, and the room was just filled with conversations everywhere. "The room was buzzing with conversations". Is that how you say it metaphorically? I'm sort of trying to make up for the horrible fail at the beginning of the evening when I couldn't get a joke made by Joost about something. I take stuff to literally and am often the last one to get a joke. If I get it at all.

As the evening carried on it was time for Dealan and me to leave. We stayed around the bonfire for a little while, telling scary stories about evil sparkling vampire wolfs that have dancing competitions and that get dragged into the bushes by a wolf with red eyes. It wasn't the most scary thing every. Then there was a sudden riddle about peace loving smurfs who wore blue hats and red hats. In the end everybody around the campfire died because they couldn't solve the riddle of the red eyed wolf who much desired to speak with Gandalf. That is what happens if you let everybody contribute one line to a whole story.

Dealan and I cycled back home together, and he let me borrow his gloves because my fingers were being reduced to popsicles. It was a very fun evening and  I avoided almost all awkward silences and moments I made a fool out of myself. Today was mighty fancy. We big each other good night, and that he will send me those Naruto parody links over Skype.

Tonight was the moment roughly ten million people have been waiting for: the season finale of Sherlock that was broadcasted this evening on BBC One. It was dark, it was sinister, and it was a mind fuck. A complete and utter devastating mind fuck to the face. Now the waiting game is on. Two years till the next season, I hope I will survive. Absolutely loved Mycroft. I like the older Holmes brother. He's just so fancy.

Now I survived today's business trip successfully I have to find a way to bluff myself through an art assignment on analyzing a painting. It's quite a big deal and I still don't have anything. Literally nothing, nada, super screwed nothing. I don't even have a painting that I want to analyze yet. I also have to do mathematics for tomorrow, still. How am I going to bluff myself through tomorrow?

It's currently 1:48 and I want something to drink, but I'm just so tired, I don't want to make an effort on actually getting something to drink. Writing today's blog has already been such an effort, I think I deserve a cookie. With chocolate. I guess I will have to get up early to make an attempt at mathematics and tell my art teacher a terrible excuse as to why I don't have my assignment.

Well, that was my day. How was yours?

- knetterzak

Steam Punk Pirate Dreams

I had the weirdest dream tonight. I was a pirate, of the sorts, I think. I was also a woman, but everybody saw me as a guy because I had short hair and was utterly flat chested. That, and the fact that I was prancing my fancy arse around through fire and explosions in an even mighty fancier suit. It looked utterly magnificent in my dream. But then again, I guess dreams come true in your dreams. Inception.

Everything in your dreams is based of on what you know. Stuff you have seen, like for example faces. This particular piece of information made me come to the conclusion that I probably have been reading too much Sherlock fan fiction. That hot tall, fair skinned man in black with those black curls flailing in the air on that ship deck while the world burned in the background. Yeah, too much Sherlock fan fiction. That won't stop me from reading more of it, though. It was a good dream. I should have more of those.

I hit the snooze button repeatedly to make the dream carry on as long as possible until it slipped from my mind forever. You forget what you dreamed about approximately ten minutes after waking up, so all I was trying to do was holding on to that dream so it wouldn't be lost in the void of my mind. Fortunately, that worked. Now I'm thinking of writing a short story  about it. A manuscript of the sort. I've done that before with an other dream I had. I should combine all the weird shit I've dreamed into a dream compilation one day. It will be fancy.

As usual I had to work today. And as usual I asked my mom six times what time it was before I headed out. I like to be right on schedule, you see. I always leave at around 12:45. Then I will arrive at the perfect time as to have enough time to put on my work cloths, but be able to leave right after that to avoid social interactions when I don't feel like having those with the excuse that "that I have to go and tend to the blue crates".

I always enter the store with a neutral expression, but when I enter the canteen I'm grinning like a fool. Why this is? Well, because I am a nervous wreck about greeting people on my way through the store. For some reason I always feel obligated to smile as I greet people to let them know I am happy to see them, regardless of that statement is true or not. No point in giving other people a crappy feeling whenever I am the one feeling down.

We had half an hour overtime, that is how bad today was. Customers were asking hard questions, sometimes even two at the same time, and with no one to turn to for an answer and not knowing the answer myself I felt pretty damn stupid on multiple occasions. I had to rush the cleaning of the canteen, which I didn't really like. I had brought my phone and headphones for some music, but I couldn't really listen to a lot of my playlist this day, unfortunately. 

I was home at around seven. I made a hamburger. When I was seasoning it I accidentally mistook the chili pepper for regular pepper, which made it super spicy. I don't like spicy food so I thought I had totally ruined my burger. To compensate for the wildfire that the burger would cause in my mouth I loaded so much cheese on my bread roll that the layer of cheese was almost as thick as the burger. It tasted magnificent, although it looked like a mis-hap of a burger: there was cheese sticking out everywhere.

I lit my candles tonight to get some warmth in my room. This didn't really go according to plan since I left the door open with my stupid head. On the bright side I did get to take a few nice photographs of the burning lights.

I looked up the first episode of Ripper street, which is now just sitting there, untouched. I got the video all set and ready to go, but I never actually hit "Play". I procrastinated about watching it to this point, and beyond. The exact thing I told myself I wouldn't do while I was looking a link for the episode. Unfortunately that ship was as doomed as the Titanic this evening.

The business trip is tomorrow, just like the release of the final episode of season three of Sherlock on BBC One. We're going to leave from the store at around 12:45 in a group. We will be cycling with a group of co-workers to the destination that is given on the little map that came with the original invitation. I'm really relieved that I can cycle with a group now. On multiple occasions it so happened to be that I was half an hour late, or didn't show up at all, all because I couldn't find the place where we were supposed to be at. I'm still nervous about the whole thing, though. Just to a lesser degree now, fortunately.

I came to the realization that I am totally in love with the Steam punk clothing style. So old school, so modern, so fancy. Also, I think that the reason that I dreamed about pirates this morning was because of what Mr Elsenaar was telling us about the Gospels of the Flying Spaghetti Monster during computer science a couple of days ago. Dressing as a pirate is a thing for Pastafarians. Pretty cool if I must say so myself.

I have made a plan of what I am going to submit for that writing competition I mentioned earlier: I'm going to compile a few of my blog posts and make it look all fancy and stuff. It's worth a shot. On a whole different note, I stuffed my face with cookies this evening. No regret.

Well, that was my day. How was yours?

- knetterzak